The 5 Verbs That Will Change Your Love Life5:39:00 AM
We often confuse something meaningful with love. We tend to see it as a state of enthusiasm. However, 'love' is a verb, and verbs a...
We often confuse something meaningful with love. We tend to see it as a state of enthusiasm. However, 'love' is a verb, and verbs are dynamic. They involve action, intention and much responsibility.
By focusing on these five, people can concretely improve their current relationships and their ability to be successful in future relationships.
1. GiveIt is the ability to be synchronized with someone else's needs, to make that person special, loved and important.
If you feel that you could give more can be because you grew up believing that nobody defended your needs, so you had to protect yourself. Maybe you feel that when you hit, you're losing something.
If it is your case, practice to feel comfortable doing it, even if you do not get something tangible in return (giving to others is also an effective antidepressant. When you give, you feel you have).
Being kind to your partner gives you power (not over the other person, but to make the bond stronger). They do not have to be expensive and great gifts. Small things can mean more when done regularly: fill the refrigerator with your partner's favorite wine, give him a message if he or she had a long day. It can be time or your attention.
And let's think about sexual goodness. It should not be a matter of giving to receive, providing something to your partner should come from a place of security and generosity, not insecurity and obligation.
Think about how many acts of kindness you have done in recent weeks against another kind of interaction. They should be in the balance. And it is desirable that it be reciprocal.
2. ReceiveDo you place those people who can not accept a compliment? Many do not give this type of comment unless there is a condition, and so they have a lot of trouble believing that someone would give it to them honestly.
If receiving something (a compliment, a gift, a cute gesture) makes you feel guilty or, well, as if you owe something, you may have to practice it.
Receiving means trusting that you care about someone simply by being who you are. And doing so is particularly sensitive during sex: letting go, not pretending when someone is making you feel pleasure.
A relationship can not be totally honest unless both parties are comfortable receiving, especially when what you receive is a joy.
3. TakeMen are taught that they must take what they need to be sexually assertive. Women have trained us that whatever pleasure a guy gives you is what you are going to receive. But that does not work.
Sometimes he does not know how to please you. Sometimes only you know it, and sharing that knowledge and talking about what you really need is the secret to evolving together, sexually speaking.
Personal reaffirmation helps you to get jobs or job promotions, and it is important that it is the same in the bedroom. I always tell girls that taking something does not have to be aggressive.
There is a difference between being assertive and aggressive. The first involves a good side of your right. The second is to exercise your power over someone to get something. Think about the phrase "take your time."
When I ask women how they would improve their sex life, many tell me that they want their partners to slow it down, to embrace it and touch it more. I tell you that taking your time means giving yourself permission to feel worthy and so reaffirm yourself.
Tell him, "I like it when you touch me here. Keep doing it. It feels excellent". Taking and asking are neighboring words. Sometimes they need to be practiced together.
4. RefuseWomen often carry out thousands of things they do not like in bed because they can not say no. But to be right with yourself, you also need to feel the option of rejecting something.
The girls follow the flow with many things to avoid hurting the feelings of their partner. So, I say, you may like to do these practices, but you will not feel good about yourself.
The key to a sex life and a pleasurable relationship is learning to say no in such a way that the door will not close completely. "I'm happy to try this, but if it does not feel right, I do not want to continue." "The way we do it is not pleasant. Maybe we could try something different. "
There are rewards for learning to say 'no' in a friendly way, without making your partner feel rejected or unloved. Setting boundaries is an essential dimension of a relationship. Sometimes it is a non-temporal, in other cases, it is a 'no' for the way to do something. But in every relationship, you need to know how far you will go and how far you will go.
5. PlayingThe ability to be playful and behave like a fool is critical in a couple's relationship. Since we were born, we make bonds with people playing.
That way we learn to trust and take risks. And we discover a lot about a person and how compatible we are, depending on how we play: who is good at playing? Who breaks the rules? This allows them to be creative and dream together, escaping from the harsh reality.
When I walk down the street with my boyfriend, suddenly, I take his hand and start doing it backward, and we begin to laugh.
In the sexual aspect, it is also important, to keep things interesting you need to have the ability to be playful, unpredictable and naughty. The freedom to lose your sorrows with someone is quite powerful.
When I hear that couples are bored, it's because they stopped playing. Laughter and playfulness are the way in which memories and adventures are created. Undoubtedly, it is the cherry of all relationships.