What Really Makes A Man Happy?

2:45:00 AM

Relationships are delicate, complex, and always changing. Some marriages last 70 years, some last 72 days. Most people enter a relationship hoping it will last a long time, if not a lifetime. There is no one-size-fits-all secret to a lasting, happy, and faithful relationship, but there are some general guidelines.

So you are here because you want to know what makes a man happy?

Presumably, you want to know the answer to that question because you want a happy relationship. But more than that, you want a happy relationship.

For instance, other articles will tell you to:

  • Make him feel secure with you
  • Give him praise in front of others
  • Let him have his space
  • Support him when he’s down without criticizing him
  • Be an excellent cook and give him delicious meals
  • Take the lead and be adventurous in the bedroom
As you can see, most of those articles tell you to put yourself second and do things for him to make him happy.

What Really Makes A Man Happy?
But if you have to consistently and consciously do things for him to try to make him happy – that means that he’s not naturally happy in the first place.

It means that you have to go out of your way and put in extra effort to ‘make him happy.

However, here’s the secret: You can act totally and 100% naturally and make him the happiest man in the world – keep reading…
Also read: 20 Lessons Learned After 20 Years of Marriage

What Makes Him Naturally Happy?

Lots of women are in relationships where they don’t feel totally secure. It can feel like they’re walking on eggshells around him and afraid to say or do the wrong thing.

Maybe it seems like he could ‘take it or leave it’ when it comes to the relationship… or it doesn’t feel like he’s super excited and WANTS to be there.

When a woman finds herself in that situation, the natural response is to look for ‘how to make a man happy.'

The logic is that if he’s happy – he’ll naturally want to stay in the relationship, and it won’t feel forced or unnatural anymore.

these lists online offer cheap band-aids to use over deeper problems in the relationship.

Cooking him a great meal isn’t going to magically make a struggling relationship into a great one.

Even worse, women who read these lists online and think that they have to do things for him to keep him happy and interested wind up getting trapped in a vicious cycle.

They do more and more for him and put in more and more effort, but they don’t see him becoming happier and more comfortable – in fact, it’s often the opposite.
Also read: Reasons Why She Is Not In The Mood For Sex

He winds up pulling away more and more… because he knows that she will keep doing whatever it takes to get him to stick around. She (rightfully) feels more and more resentful, which makes him pull away more and more, which eventually causes the relationship to collapse.

The truth is, if you’re looking for shortcuts on how to quickly and easily make a man happy (by doing a few things off of a list), you’re going to be disappointed.

Best case scenario – you slap a band-aid on a relationship that’s struggling and keep the status quo for a while longer. Worst case scenario – your relationship enters a death spiral that becomes harder and harder to get out of.

Here’s a hint: it’s much better to be in a relationship that naturally makes both people happy.

And yes, I understand the response to that is ‘duh, who wouldn’t want that?!?!’

It’s true – that’s an obvious statement, and it’s true – it might seem out of reach or even impossible to you right now.

But in fact, it’s possible for every man and every woman to be in a relationship like that. Here’s how:

How To Have A Naturally Happy Relationship

Here’s what the ideal relationship is: it’s a relationship where both partners are usually happy… and apparently, make each other happy.

His natural state will be happiness – you won’t have to ‘do’ something special for him to be happy.

He just wakes up and is glad to be there, happy to be in a relationship with you and glad to wake up next to you.

That’s not just possible, that’s what every single person deserves in a relationship. And I can tell you the way to get there is not to look up a list of ways to make him happy online and start picking things off the list.

Here’s the secret to a naturally happy man in a relationship:

Guys are happy when the relationship is going well.

That means that he’s not worried about ‘saying the wrong thing’ and stumbling into a fight. He doesn’t have to walk on eggshells to avoid trouble or ‘drama.'

There’s no unresolved tension or lingering resentment in the relationship, and he feels calm, comfortable, and relaxed when he’s with you.

He knows beyond a doubt that you’re happy in how you’re living your life on your own, and your relationship with him is the cherry on top of an already happy life.

Most importantly, he’s happy when he knows he can make you happy.

I’m not saying that he thinks it’s solely his responsibility to make you happy – that’s an easy and quick way to turn a guy off and get him to want to escape. The truth is, both people in a great relationship are happy before they get into the relationship. The relationship is icing on the cake, not the cake itself.

Rather, he knows that when he is his natural, normal, relaxed self – his real self without the mask that he puts on for other people and the outside world – that person that he actually makes you genuinely happy.

That’s the best way to make a man happy in a relationship: when he knows, deep down, that you accept him for who he truly is.

Not for the person, he is when he’s wearing a mask. Not for who he is at work, or with his friends. When you accept him as the person he truly is, deep down, when ‘no one is watching’ – he will be truly happy.

If he can be his true, authentic, natural self around you –and you accept that person and rejoice in that person, and that person makes you happy – then you will make him happier than any relationship has ever made him. (And that’s how you get him to enthusiastically stay by your side).

So now the question becomes, how do you get to that point?

How do you make a relationship where both people naturally make each other truly happy and accept each other for who they truly are?

What Leads To The Perfect Relationship?

The answer is simple: you find someone who you’re compatible with.

A 100% compatible match is the foundation to any good relationship. You simply can’t have a fantastic relationship that lasts without being genuinely consistent with the other person.

Most of the relationship questions that I get where the woman is suffering through the most heartbreak are relationships between incompatible people.

The women who come to me in the most pain are the women trying to make a different match work, who are trying day and night to fit a square peg into a round hole.

That way only leads to disaster and heartbreak. The truth is, women (and men) who do the most “fighting to keep their relationship alive” are the ones who suffer and struggle the most in their relationships.

Healthy relationships are supposed to be effortless. That doesn’t mean that neither party puts in any work into the relationship, it means that both people feel naturally healthy and happy around each other, because they’re deeply compatible with each other.

So even when the relationship runs into trouble and hardship, both partners know that they’re on the same side, pulling in the same direction and that they have each other’s backs.

Remember, if you want a relationship that lasts, you have to be truly compatible with your partner. Only you can judge whether or not you’re compatible, and on that question, I would counsel you to listen to your gut and listen to your instincts.

When you’re with someone that you’re truly compatible with, the relationship feels effortless – and you effortlessly and naturally make each other happy. You don’t have to ‘do’ anything special to make him happy… you make him happy only by being yourself. And he makes you happy simply by being himself.

Once you have that, the rest is gravy, and neither you nor he ever wants to let each other go.

Want to find out he’s slipping away from you.

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